


White Out

by Furei



Category: Homestuck
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-05-27
Updated: 2013-05-27
Packaged: 2017-12-13 04:37:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,227
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/820056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Furei/pseuds/Furei
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>No memories and a blank slate. Four kids, one room, one game, and a revelation.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue aka Pilot Chapter

**Author's Note:**

> Hello potential readers. This story, tentatively named "White Out". It's a sadstuck idea that I got stuck in my head a couple months back, and am slowly piecing together. Be warned: I know where I'm starting, and how I'm going to end it, but figuring out the middle is slow going and difficult, so please bear with me.
> 
> If you haven't noticed yet, I'm new to writing, so please be kind. Comments and suggestions on things like fluency and style would be welcome and appreciated.
> 
> If I go too far off canon in anyway in terms of character personality, I apologize, but it's how the characters are in my head for this story.
> 
> There are three chapters I have written at the moment, and am not sure how well received this fic will be, so I'll probably wait on releasing them. I don't know how long this is going to be, and the chapters WILL be short, so please keep that all in mind.

**_0._ **

_White._

_Everything’s so white_.

 

That was my first thought as I opened my eyes. Everything around me was white; even what I was wearing. The wall, the floor, everything. As I layed there, I realized something felt odd.

 

_What’s wet?_

 

 I sat up and looked around.

 

_Where is this place?_

 

I looked around and for the first time noticed I wasn’t alone is this totally white room. There were more people: a boy and two girls. They were dressed in all white too.  Suddenly there was that warm wet feeling on my face again. I reached up and wiped at my face.

 

_Are these…tears?_

 

I looked at the evidence on my hands. Yes, they were indeed tears.

 

_But…why? Why am I crying?_

 

The faces of the three other people flashed in my mind. I looked over at them again and the hot feeling returned to my eyes.

 

_Why? Why am I sad for these people? Who are they to make me so sad?_

 

The thought burned in my mind. I did not know these people. But as I continued to stare, words bubbled to the surface in my mind.

 

_That one…the boy with the short blond hair. He’s…Dave…_

 

But who was Dave?

 

_The others too…the girl with the long black hair…she’s Jade…and the other girl…Rose._

 

Who were Jade and Rose? As I turned my head to look at my hands again, a thought took shape in my mind.

 

_Who…who am…I? I…what am I to these people? Who are they to me?_

 

So many questions filled my head.

Voices began to filter into my mind.

 

“John, don’t go! You’re gonna die!”

“John! You’ve got to wake up John! ------- is on fire! Everything’s falling down to ----! Please wake up!“

 

Dave…and Jade.

John…is that my name? What were they talking about? Nothing’s falling down or on fire, and I’m not going anywhere. I looked to my left at them again. They didn’t look distressed like those voices sounded. Was it really them?

 

_Ouch._

_There’s that throbbing again. What keeps causing it?_

 

Something  bubbled in the back of my mind. A panic filled my chest and I squeezed my eyes shut. Images began to flash behind my eyelids.

 

Clowns. Black clowns, clowns with tentacles and wings. A black winged dog with a sword through its chest. Blood. Blood. Blood. So much blood.

 

My eyes snapped open as a cold sweat broke out over my body.

 

_Wha-What was that?! Those horrible clowns and the…blood. So much blood. And those people…they were…dead… --- was dead. So was ----‘s ---._

_Wait. ---? Who is ---?_

 

Again the tears flowed from my eyes. The panic was gone now, but it was being replaced by a feeling of depair so complete I felt like I would crumple in on myself.

 

_They’re dead! They’re all dead! Why…WHY?!_

 

More images flashed in my head. More images of blood and death. And, for the first time, something else: color.

 

Blues and Greens. Reds. Pinks.

 

_Red? That’s…the color of…blood. Blood? No…please, no! NO! NO NO NO!_

_I don’t!_

_NONONONO!_

_I don’t want to!_

_NONONONO!_

_I don’t want to…REMEMBER!_

 

As I screamed that last word in my mind a light flashed in my mind and I fell back down. Everything went blank. Everything went _white_.


	2. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello readers! If you're reading this, thank you for any/all continued support!

_**1.** _

When I woke again, everything was still white and still unfamiliar. I knew who my companions in the room were this time, though I still did not know why I knew them. The sight of them, though only sleeping, still made my chest tight and my eyes hot. But this time I could think around it.

 

_What WAS that? Why did I pass out?_

 

Though I remembered these people, that I had woken, and that something had caused me panic and pass out, I could not remember WHAT had caused it.  When I concentrated and tried to think about it, my head began to hurt and a panic started up in my chest.

 

_Maybe…maybe whatever that was can just wait until later._

 

I knew I was putting off something that was important, but as I sat there, looking around the white room, I didn’t care.

 

_But…I can’t just sit here crying forever, right?_

 

After chastising myself, I slid of the bed-like block that I had been on. As my feet touched the ground, I was surprised that the floor was neither cold nor hot.

 

_Now that I think about it, this room is like that too. A too-perfect temperature. And why is everything so white?_

 

I decided to see if the view outside the single, solitary window might be more colorful, and maybe give me some clues as to where this was and why we were all here.

 

_And maybe why I can’t seem to remember anything; even my own name!_

As I got up to walk towards the window I tried to look around the practically empty room. It was really hard to see anything much farther than a few feet in front of my face though, so it was hard to tell what all was in the room.

 

_Whoever I was must have been blind as a bat! I really wish I had some glasses or something so I could see farther…it won’t matter what’s outside the window if I can’t even see it!_

 

Click

 

_Wha-?_

 

I spun around almost to nearly fall over the block that I had been sleeping on. As my hands swept over the block’s surface, trying to catch my balance, my hands brushed by something ON the block.

 

_Are these…glasses? They look kind of…nerdy…_

 

I tried them on in a combination of hope and fear. Hope that they’d work so I could actually see. Fear that they’d work and I’d have to look like a nerd, since there clearly weren’t any other options handy.

They fit.

 

_Of course._

 

I continued my short walk to the window and peered outside.

 

_No way…it’s impossible!_

 

The outside WAS a change from the white room, but not for the better. It was just blank. There was nothing. There was white, but not like the lack of color white from inside the room. It was a white of nothingness.

 

“Mph hpmh.”

 

I looked over my shoulder.

 

“Hehe. Can’t wait…to show John around…Prospit! It’ll be so…much fun!”

 

_Oh. It was the girl, Jade. She must be talking in her sleep. Talking about…John…about me._

_But what could she mean, showing around Prospit? What was “Prospit”?_

 

Curious, and realizing my window venture was going to be fruitless, I padded over to where she slept. She had a smile on her face and seemed to be enjoying a nice dream.

 

_How nice. I wonder what she dreams about. I can’t remember what, if anything, I’ve dreamt about._

 

Suddenly her face seemed to sour, as if her pleasant dream had somehow turned into a nightmare. Her smile became a frown and a tear rolled from her eye.

 

“No…Don’t leave me…alone.”

 

She seemed to be begging for someone, or perhaps something.

She whimpered with her plea and more tears fell. Struck by a sudden impulse, I reached out to brush away her tears, wishing only to try and take away some of her sadness, though I couldn’t fathom why I would wish that.

My hand just lightly brushed her face. Only the barest of contacts.

 

“Oh…!”

 

She breathed the word. Surprised, I jerked my hand back. Her eyelids fluttered and opened. As I watched, my eyes met with hers. And for the first time I saw color.

Her eyes were the purest shade of _green._


	3. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We get to see a little more of the interactions between John and Jade.

_**2.** _

_What a beautiful shade of green._

 

That was my first thought when I met Jade. Or, as she would need to remind me many times, when I reunited with her.

 

I had jerked back my hand when Jade first opened her eyes, and now I was just standing there, open-mouthed, staring at her.

 

Trying to recover even a fraction of my composure, I snapped my gaping jaw shut.

 

_Please tell me she didn’t see that…_

 

I risked a glance, hoping that she wouldn’t be laughing.

 

Jade had sat up, but was sitting dazed with her head in her right hand; her left supporting her as she sat up straighter. Worried now, I looked closely at her face. There was blankness there, and dread filled me.

 

_No! Not her too! Does she not remember anything either?_

 

Slowly blinking her eyes, she gave her head a small shake, like she was trying to clear some image from her mind. I let the breath out I didn’t even know I was holding.

 

Apparently I had been louder than I thought: Jade jerked at the sound. Her head whipped up and her eyes met mine again. I couldn’t break contact with those green eyes and I took a few steps back, afraid of questions she might ask; questions that I couldn’t answer, since I didn’t know the answers myself.

 

She just stared at me. It must only have been a minute or two, but it felt like more, until her eyes began to focus. Or, perhaps I should saw that some clarity returned. Because even as sharpness returned to her eyes, she began to squint, as if she couldn’t see very well.

 

She glanced down and felt around for something. Apparently finding what she was looking for, she looked back up at me and put a pair of similar-to-my-dorky-looking glasses on.

 

_Oh great, two dorky-looking kids with no memor---_

 

Even as that thought began to form in my head, I realized I couldn’t be more wrong. As Jade’s eyes looked back up to mine from her glasses, they began to crinkle and a big grin spread across her face.

 

“John…!”

 

My heart dropped.

 

Jade spun around on her bed to properly face me, placed both hands on the edge, and pushed herself off. She landed lightly on the ground. Looking like kid on Christmas morning, she launched herself at me over the couple of steps between us.

 

She slammed into me so hard she nearly knocked us both over. As I struggled to keep our balance, Jade hugged me furiously. After nearly crushing my ribs in, she finally leaned back, still smiling that big smile.

 

“John! I’ve missed you so much!”

 

I just stood there. I wanted to be happy, I really did. Part of me was so happy that Jade could remember, that I was something to her. But a bigger part of me was filled with jealousy.

 

_Why can she remember? This isn’t fair! Why do I have to remain in the dark about everything?!_

 

Something must have shown on my face. Her smile fell, and a troubled look came across her face.

 

“John…?”

 

Jade’s question made me embarrassed and filled me with shame.

 

_How could I possibly get mad? It’s not like she caused my memory loss, right? In fact, she’s happy to see me! I should be happy too!_

 

I tried to put a smile on my face, but it was lopsided and forced.

 

Jade knew. She could see that something was wrong. It didn’t take her long to figure out why, either.

 

“John…can you not remember what happened? Anything?”

 

I looked down and shook my head. Shame caused my face to flush, and I couldn’t bring myself to look up and meet her eyes again.

 

“John…look at me. Please.”

 

I shook my head again. I couldn’t do it.

 

A hand gently took my face and pulled it up. I still wouldn’t bring my eyes up though.

 

“Jo-“

Her voice hitched.

 

Alarmed, I jerked my eyes up to look at her face. There were tears in her eyes.

 

_What?! Why is she crying?!_

 

Confused and not knowing what else to do, I reached out and patted her head.

 

Jade immediately pulled both her hands to her face and began sobbing. 

 

Not knowing why and not knowing why not, I pulled her into a light hug, shooshing her like a small child and lightly patting her head.

 

_Sigh_

_How did it turn out like this? How did it become me comforting Jade? I’m the one that wants to cry._

_But I can’t just…I have to take care of her…_

After several minutes, her sobbing finally quieted down and her shoulders ceased shaking.

 

After several more, Jade pushed herself away from me, her face down this time.  The tips of her ears, poking out from her hair, were red.

 

_Is she…Is she embarrassed?_

 

With a smirk and a touch of mischievousness, I flicked Jade lightly on her forehead.

 

Surprised, she jerked her head up.

 

The bewildered look on her face was too funny. A huge grin broke out over my face.

 

Jade looked at me with a confused look, like I was crazy for smiling when I couldn’t remember anything.

 

“Are you alright, John?”

 

Still smiling, I lightly shook my head.

 

Not a confirmation, but also not disagreement.

 

The skeptical look on her face told me she didn’t believe me one bit, but I didn’t care.

 

It was so nice to finally not be alone anymore. All the important things can wait. For now, I just want to revel in this moment.

 

But of course those peaceful times couldn’t last.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading~

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading my pilot chapter of "White Out"! I really hope you enjoyed it!
> 
> For those curious about the title of my work, let me provide you a simple definition:  
> A white out is a loss of visibility, of sight, in weather conditions such as fog, snow, or rain. 
> 
> As the story comes together, I believe and hope that the reason for this title should become more and more apparent. However, at the risk of spoiling plot, I will not discuss it further.
> 
> Also, there will be more characters, but I really would rather not spoil it by putting characters in the tags who have yet to make their entrance.


End file.
